


Shepard the Pirate Queen

by TheMulletWhisperer



Category: Mass Effect Trilogy
Genre: Action/Adventure, Alternate Universe - Pirate, Bad guys, Cerberus - Freeform, Eventual Smut, F/F, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Smut, Futanari, Gen, Intense, Intrigue, Other, Plot Driven, Romance, Smut, The smut wasn't so eventual, mostly plot, not much smut
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-06-12
Updated: 2019-05-15
Packaged: 2019-05-21 08:39:46
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 6
Words: 15,889
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14912117
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheMulletWhisperer/pseuds/TheMulletWhisperer
Summary: Without the looming threat of the Reapers, lawlessness rules the depths of space. Captain Shepard, leader of a small crew aboard the Phalanx, receives a life-changing message from a mysterious benefactor, setting her on a path to purchase the stars.





	1. Benny

**Author's Note:**

> I decided to make this. It was DefaultJane's fault for egging me on. Enjoy.

Amelie Shepard rose from her bed, her booted feet clicking dully on the floor and her cargo pants rustling against the sheets. The soft orange glow of the overhead lights flickered in the captain’s cabin, playing off the bare plasteel bulkhead, emphasizing the rusted colors of the dingy ship. Whatever noises the ship’s scrap of an engine carried through the walls were drowned out by the buzzing of the frayed electronics that lay exposed. Through the radiation-burned window filtered the light of a far-off nebula in the otherwise empty void. 

The woman groaned quietly and pushed up to her feet, threading her fingers through her short-clipped, raven-black head of hair as she grabbed her undershirt from the patched floor below, pulling it over her head and smoothing the sleeveless top of all its wrinkles. From the corner of her eye, she caught the sleeping form in the bed next to her, similarly clothed. Shepard smiled softly and scooped up her double-breasted combat shirt, layering the top over the bottom and clasping it in place. 

She approached her desk, grabbing the blast-plate vest from the back of her chair and hitting the power button on the large terminal that was pressed against the wall, waiting for the ancient behemoth to boot up while she strapped on her vest. 

Inevitably, the rumbling jostled the other woman in the room awake. “Mmn… love, it’s only four in the morning, come back to bed.” The accented voice carried easily through the cabin, powering through the many noises of the poorly-maintained ship. 

“I wish I could, Tali.” She flicked a switch and watched the crisp, orange display flicker to life behind a bevy of scan lines. She tapped her inbox, of which there was only one message. “But someone promised a big score here, and I’m not gonna be able to sleep until I find out what it is.” Amelie clarified as she tapped a few keys in frustration--a futile attempt to unfreeze the monitor. While she waited, she turned back and gave a soft smile to Tali’s frustration--evident even through her mask. “I promise I’ll make it up to you later, yeah?” She winked softly before turning back as the screaming of the terminal’s processor died down and allowed her to view the message--an action she promptly took.

_ “[CONFIDENTIAL] - Phalanx Captain Only”  _ read the subject line. 

“Not sure who they think they’re discouraging with that.” Shepard muttered with a chuckle as she thought to all the crew members who would gladly snoop through her mail. She continued down the message.

_ “Captain, _

_ I’m sure you understand the need for this subterfuge. I could get in significant amounts of trouble for sending this message. I hear you’ve been… looking for an upgrade. I believe I have one for you.  _

_ There is one condition to this, however, and that is that you allow me to accompany you after this score. If you do not agree to this, I have no quarrels releasing everything I have on you to the authorities--and some more… unsavory types, I’m sure you understand.”  _

“So, it’s blackmail, huh?” Amelie shrugged slightly, used to the tactic by now and hardly fazed by it.

_ “I am certain you know of Cerberus, the group who advocate the advancement of humanity. There has always been a suspicion that they were working on something larger than their front, and I’m here to tell you that they are. Two years ago, the Alliance were developing an experimental cruiser known as the SSV Normandy, which carried with it several cutting-edge technologies that gave them a leg up on their competition. However, after an attack by… enigmatic forces, the Normandy was thoroughly destroyed, along with her crew. Or so they thought. Cerberus retrieved what remained of the cruiser and began working on upgrading the formula. As of today, they have succeeded. The ship is awaiting a crew at a dry dock at the coordinates attached. _

_ Obviously, if one were to attempt to steal this ship, they would require the override codes--which I just so happen to possess. Once you’ve cleared out the resistance, I’ll be waiting for you in the control room. We have a small window of time in which this can be achieved, so if you wish to obtain this vessel, you must hurry to these coordinates.  _

_ Good luck, _

 

  * __Benefactor”__



Shepard nodded slowly as she read along, reaching the final line and cracking a smile. “Well, it looks like we’ve got a score.” She turned back to Tali, who’d fallen back asleep while Shepard was reading the message. Quietly, she reached behind her and flicked the terminal off, the pained screeching of the artifact of technology instantly dying. She checked her vest one more time before grabbing the shotgun that lay up against the desk, slinging it over her shoulder and approaching Tali, kissing her mask gently before turning and heading for the door.

 

/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/

 

“All Phalanx crew to the bridge, repeat, all Phalanx crew to the bridge.” Amelie spoke into the intercom wired into the nonfunctional command terminal, her voice transmitting across the dreadnaught through the patchy speakers. It took a few minutes, but the entire crew gathered on the bridge of the vessel. There weren’t many--especially for such a large ship. Tali, their engineer, Garrus, the weapons operator, Joker, the pilot, and Williams, the ship’s cook. Together, they kept the ship just barely functional, though all the down time allowed them to fix what might have broken between fights. 

As they gathered around, Shepard wasted no time in speaking up. “We’ve got a Benny in play, they’re steering us toward a big score, maybe one big enough to get us off this hunk of rusty shit.” She kicked the console she stood in front of for good measure, of which the maintenance panel fell off. “My point. We’ve got to move quickly, though. Joker, I’ve plugged the coordinates into the console already, once we’re on our way we need to move quickly. I’ll brief you then. Tali, get the engines warmed up for a mass effect jump. Garrus, get the guns ready. We’ll need to catch them off guard if we’re going to do this right.” Her gaze tracked over the skeleton crew to Ashley, boring through her critically before she spoke up again, “Williams, gear up, we’ll need every body we can get for this.” The girl perked up and nodded.

“Sure thing, cap’n! I won’t let you down!” Her enthusiasm bled into her voice as she rushed to prep the second-rate gear she’d been given. She was gung-ho, but that’s what made her the perfect cannon fodder. Plus, if she died, it would give Shepard a reason to hire a new cook.

“Right, let’s get a move on, we don’t have all day, the window is closing soon.” Amelie clapped her hands and rolled up her sleeves, approaching Tali as the crew scattered and placing a hand on her hip. “Stay safe when we’re there, yeah?” She whispered, hoping none of the crew overheard her before flashing a smile and heading back to her room for a quick nap.

 

/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/

 

_ “Captain, we’re approaching the target.”  _ Joker’s voice crackled over the intercom, waking Shepard from her sleep. She slid out of the bed almost instantly and grabbed her gun. Making for the hangar without a word in response.  _ “Uh… Captain? You there?”  _ A follow up came over, but she was already long gone by that time.

Shouldering her shotgun, Amelie approached their single shuttle, an old Turian model that had long since been retired. She had enough tech-smarts to fix it up, but the damn thing still wouldn’t fly straight no matter how she toyed with it. Not that it had to do much to get them where they needed to go. “Alright, you all got the briefing I sent. The guns are set to auto-fire as soon as we drop out. We go in fast, hit them hard, and meet the Benny, got it? Remember, stay tight, I’m not losing anyone to this shit.” She allowed the crew to mutter their agreements before the four of them boarded the shuttle, leaving Joker behind to pilot their ship. 

Shepard took the pilot’s seat, shutting the doors behind her and powering on the thrusters just in time for them to drop out of the jump. Before sound could catch up to them, the familiar rumble of the pulse cannons shook the vessel, punching several holes in the hull of the small station. Without a second thought, Amelie hit the thrusters and carried them out of the hangar, the old shuttle admirably holding together at a fast speed. 

By the time they reached the first hull breach, the response fighters had yet to be deployed. The plan was going off well, so far. The shuttle broke through the shield, grinding to a halt on the metal floors. The doors of the vessel hissed open and Shepard stepped out, rebreather fastened to her face as a precaution. A quick sweep of the area told her whoever had been guarding this room didn’t make it out, judging by the bodies. She signalled her crew out, the other three pouring out of the shuttle with weapons at the ready, their breathing protected similarly. Amelie took point, striking the door’s mechanism with the stock of her shotgun, yanking out several wires and forcing the door open. 

On the other side stood a team of commandos looking to do the same thing, their technician busy with the panel. “Light ‘em up!” Shepard called, squeezing the trigger of her shotgun and punching a hole straight through the chest of the armed man, while Williams’ rifle riddled the technician with holes. “Nice shooting, cook.” Amelie called behind her in a bare acknowledgement of the action before pushing forward. 

The station looked clean, professionally-maintained, and sterile. It was a jarring shift from her usual hangouts, and indeed her own vessel, the fluorescent lights searing her steel-gray eyes. Nonetheless, she simply squinted and pressed on, relying on her crew to be her eyes. 

“Hold up a second!” The voice of the Turian called out to her as she reached another locked door. Turning on her heel and blinking the water from her burning eyes, she tried to focus on what Garrus was pointing to. It looked to be a map of the station. As she’d hoped, they’d landed just near to the hangar their score was docked in. 

“Okay, alright. Good.” She nodded, memorizing the layout and patting Garrus on the shoulder. “Good find, man. Let’s--” She was interrupted by the door creaking open as a team of soldiers heaved it open. “Fuck!” Amelie pulled the trigger on her shotgun once again--the shot plinking harmlessly against the walls and proving itself more or less totally ineffectual. 

“Get them!” One of the soldiers at the back shouted, his voice filtered through his helmet. “Don’t let--” His shouting was cut short by a slug to the face as Tali took a shot with her Predator. The rest of the crew backed her up, forming a basic firing line and pulling their triggers until whoever stood on the other side of the door lay dead on the floor. 

“Fuck me. Good job.” Shepard took a deep breath, checking her weapon’s ammo stores. It seemed, in her haste, she’d forgotten to replace the heat sink. Reaching into her bag and grabbing one of the many she carried, she rectified the problem quickly. “Let’s keep going before they come down on our asses.” She stepped over the bodies in the doorway and carried on, the once bright lights of the corridors washing the walls red, a klaxon alarm bouncing through the hallways. 

The hangar they were looking for was just ahead, helpfully labelled, while off to the side was the control room. Calling back to the message she’d received only hours earlier, the Captain chose the latter door, banging on the hull of the door.

The team fell silent for a moment as a gunshot rang out from the other side, putting Shepard on alert as the door began to pull open as slowly as possible. Once it had finally clicked into place, their ‘Benny’ was revealed. A woman, almost six foot, wearing a form-fitting white jumpsuit that caused the slightest stir in Shepard’s pants, the fabric of her underwear tightening a bit. “Um…” She cleared her throat, shifting uncomfortably as she felt the burning gaze of Tali behind her. “You’re… the Benn--benefactor, right?” She glanced to the dead operator on the ground.

“I’m surprised you actually made it here.” The woman carried a soft accent that Shepard couldn’t quite place, though it sounded earthborn. “Come on, your score is right through here.” The benefactor motioned to the fiberglass window to her side.

Cautiously, Shepard stepped over the threshold and peered through the window, her team remaining in the doorway. A large frigate came into view, the lights dancing off of the silvery hull and the faintest of gleam shining from the glossy black stripes along the side. To say she was beautiful was an understatement. She took Amelie’s breath away and held it in a jar. “Ho-ly shit. I could fucking kiss you right now.” She muttered in the direction of the benefactor without thinking, a filtered cough from somewhere behind her snapping her out of the trance. “Um, I mean, if I didn’t already have someone.” Desperately, she changed the subject. “Well, come on, let’s get those override codes and get out of here.” She waved her hand in a circle, glancing out the door.

  
“Remember our deal, Captain. I’m more than willing to go down.” The wording wasn’t particularly helpful to Shepard, especially as the black-haired woman bent over a console to put in the codes. Hastily, Amelie wiped her upper lip with her fingers, twitching her nose and checking for blood. Not that there was any left to go somewhere else. 

A few moments of silence passed before she realized everyone was staring at her, waiting for a response. “Um… oh. Yeah, our deal. Come on, let’s go.” She made a half-hearted motion with her hand and turned back, avoiding Tali’s gaze entirely as the door hissed open. “Joker.” She spoke into her comms, “We’re ready, let’s get…” She trailed off as she laid eyes on their pilot, already standing--well, leaning in the middle of the hangar.

“Hey there! I had to jump ship a bit early because… well.” He glanced back out into space, several fighters swarming a flaming dreadnaught. “That happened. But hey, we have a new ship!” He pointed at the frigate, looking like a child in a candy shop. 

“Fuck, I didn’t get my… um… things. From the Phalanx. Never mind. Come on, let’s go.” She waved the crew forward and allowed the benefactor to take point, using every ounce of her willpower not to watch that perfect ass and those… swaying hips… and… fuck, she was staring again. Quickly, she looked away, hoping Tali hadn’t seen it. Gracefully, the door hissed open, the hydraulics pouring out a white mist as the cabin depressurized.

“Come on, nobody’s on board. I sealed the doors, we need to get out of here before they catch up.” The benefactor boarded the ship, disappearing into the airlock. Consciously, Shepard waited a few moments to follow, nodding to Joker as she boarded the vessel. 

As the airlock slid open to allow her access, her breath was once again taken at the sight of the interior. Finally, a ship with proper inner walls, no exposed wiring and terminals less than twenty years old. The sight put her in a trance, her eyes going wide as she wandered around the bridge.

“...Captain?” A voice crackled over her comms and she snapped out of it.

“Yeah, what’s… what do you need?” She tried not to come off as irritated, but it didn’t exactly work.

“We’re ready for takeoff whenever you are. And you should probably be ready because they found us.” Joker’s voice buzzed in her ear.

“Okay, yeah, let’s go, hit it.” She seemed a bit confused as the engine failed to start, but as the docking clamps released she realized that the engine couldn’t actually be heard from the command deck. Everything was looking up. “Hit it!” She commanded again, scrambling to the cockpit to watch them depart. Everything was so smooth she felt like she was walking on air. Or possibly dreaming. 

“Hey Cap, check this out!” Joker shouted over his shoulder and hit a button, sending a bright blue torpedo out. The projectile struck the Phalanx, cracking it down the middle and sending out a shockwave as the reactor exploded. “Fuck yeah, suck it, garbage heap!” He cried, his voice ringing through the cockpit as they sped away from the scene of the crime, scot free and riding high.


	2. The Smut One

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay so maybe the smut wasn't happening so "eventually". Plot progresses in the next chapter, don't you worry.
> 
> Oh yeah and if chicks with dicks (I fucking hate myself someone come and kill me right fucking now) aren't your thing you might want to steer clear of the latter half of this chapter.
> 
> Hopefully this won't be too regular a thing, I'd like this to be plot-driven, but you never know what the tunneling brain parasite will make me do.

The crew gathered around their new CIC, along with their plus-one. All eyes were trained on Shepard as she climbed the steps to the galaxy map, resting her hands on the railing and recoiling a bit as the map automatically responded. “Right, guys.” She cleared her throat and began speaking, “This could be a game changer, if we play our cards right. This baby…” She ran her hand across the railing for emphasis, taking a deep breath through her nose, “she’ll make us the envy of the underworld. We’ve just got to make ourselves worthy of that title. Everybody, familiarize yourselves with the systems. Garrus,” She pointed to the Turian first, “go find the weapons systems, get everything checked out and make sure we can use them. Tali, get to work on the engines. Williams, find the kitchen.” The cook seemed upset by that command but didn’t argue for her own good, stifling a pout and heading for the elevators with the rest of the crew, leaving behind only Shepard and her benefactor.

“So.” The Captain began, stepping down from the CIC and approaching the perfectly normal, ravishingly sexy woman with perfect hips and… 

Shepard leaned up against the console, forcing her eyes to the benefactor’s face and crossing her legs a bit awkwardly as her pants strained again. “Um… why don’t we start with what your name is and why you came to us of all people.” Amelie took the opportunity to stick a hand in her pocket and hold back  the embarrassing tenting. 

“My name is Miranda Lawson,” The woman began, either not noticing or not caring about the Captain’s current predicament. “I worked with Cerberus for a time, but we had something of a… falling out over the Normandy here. So, I figured, why not kill two birds with one stone?” She ended at that, crossing her arms and shifting her weight, leaving Shepard confused.

“You… maybe want to clarify that?” Amelie spoke up after a few seconds of silence, once she was sure Miranda wasn’t going to continue on.

The woman nodded slightly, a very faint blush creeping to her cheeks, “Well, I heard there was a pirate captain out there who was something of a… genetic anomaly.” She nodded pointedly to the ill-concealed bulge in Shepard’s pants. “I wanted to figure her out.” Miranda finished, shifting her weight again and being so effortlessly sexy in every possible way, driving Shepard crazy in ways most could only dream of.

Even so, Amelie was not impressed, frowning slightly. “Yeah, okay, let me get one thing straight with you, lady. I’m taken, got it? I’m not going to have you poking and prodding around my dick, I don’t care if it’s in the name of science or sex or what-fucking-ever, but Tali is mine and I’m not going to sleep around behind her back.” Shepard had to keep the anger out of her voice, which was difficult enough without her attentions divided and her brain at war with her sex drive. “I’m a pirate, but I’m not a bastard, got it?”

  
Miranda bent her arms at the elbow and held her palms out, “I meant no offense, Ms. Shepard. It is purely scientific curiosity.” Although she seemed sincere, it was difficult to tell through the barely-shifting facial expressions. “Even so, I can’t well go back to Cerberus. I can still fight, and you’ll need a much bigger crew to handle a ship like this. I volunteer myself.”

Shepard tilted her chin up, pursing her lips slightly and sizing up the woman for the first time. “Well, you  _ were  _ with Cerberus so I guess that means you don’t care what we do to other people.” She was speaking mostly to herself at first, but tilted her head back down to speak more directly, “Alright, listen up, then. This crew is a family, nobody is going to treat you like a family for a long time, you’ve got to be okay with that, at least until you earn their respect. Nobody here likes you authoritarian pricks in the Alliance or in Cerberus or whatever, so it’s gonna be tough to earn that, but you keep it straight, stay honest, and don’t act like a cunt, and you’ll get along just fine.” She paused for a fraction of a second before continuing, “And if I find out you’re a mole, I’ll personally bleed you to death, got it?” Her voice was dead serious as she spoke from experience, having brutally killed several moles within her crew in the past. 

Miranda nodded as Shepard’s monologue came to a close, folding her arms over her chest and once again sending a shot of warmth straight down to Shepard’s groin. “I know all about what you do to spies, you have my word. I’ll go introduce myself to the crew.” She began toward the elevator, prompting a conscious effort from Amelie not to watch her shapely ass. 

“Captain cabin’s mine!” Shepard shouted back at Miranda as she herself headed for the cockpit to check on Joker, unclasping her vest and draping it over the back of one of the vacant technician’s chairs on the flight deck. 

As she approached the cockpit, her senses were assaulted by beeping terminals glowing a bright orange. “Fuckin’ hell.” She whispered, shielding her eyes her from the brightness. “Everything looking good up here, Joker?” She raised her voice over the beeping as Joker spun around in his chair with a grin on his face to shame a circus clown.

“Uh, better than good! This is some  _ cutting edge _ shit, they don’t even have this on the military markets yet! I have no idea where Cerberus got the tech to put this together, but I’m not complaining. Of course, they did have tracking code in here but that was an easy fix. Corporate assholes.” He pointed wildly to all the implements as he talked, setting off several more terminals.

“That’s great, Joker!” Shepard raised her voice even higher, desperate to get out of the cockpit. “Listen, just plot us a course to Omega, alright?!” She ducked out of the cockpit before she could hear his answer, nearly running away from the beeping. “Jesus.” Amelie whispered to herself, running a hand through her hair and heading for the elevator herself.

/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/

Despite wanting nothing more than to check out her new digs, there was something more important to do first. The elevator glided to a halt on the engineering deck, only one floor above the hangar. As Shepard stepped out, she took a cursory look around the place. A window sealed by a blast door, a couple of side rooms, nothing too extravagant. Then again, the guts of the ship never were, and her experience with technology extended to shuttles and little else. 

She took a sharp turn into the engine room, the hydraulic doors sliding shut without so much as a sound. The compartment was even more of an assault on the eyes than the engineering deck. Dark walls illuminated by red utility lights were not exactly a-grade when it came to seeing things, but engineers did tend to be a different sort of person.

Nonetheless, she pressed on, approaching the observation alcove where her lover stood, going through the engine terminal. Shepard took a deep, quiet breath, her noise masked by the thrum of the engine. “Hey there, Tali.” She winced at herself and how pathetic that had sounded. The Quarian didn’t react as Amelie stepped up to her. “Listen, I um… I’m sorry about that, back at the station.” She went to place a hand on the Quarian’s hip, only to be pulled away from. 

“You should be.” The Quarian’s voice was nearly drowned out by the engine, but Shepard was close enough to hear it.

“Yeah, yeah, I’m…” Amelie glanced down at her feet. “I don’t really have an explanation, I don’t know what came over me. You know I’ll never go behind your back, right? I love you, Tali, I don’t want to hurt you.” The hard exterior of the pirate captain fell away under her apologies.

  
“I know, Shepard. I know why, it’s because I can’t take care of you like I should. I’m--” 

Amelie cut her off, shaking her head quickly, “No no no, that’s not it, I promise, Tali. If I had a problem with that I would’ve left a long time ago. Believe it or not, sex isn’t everything to me.” She chuckled a bit, the Quarian echoing the noise a moment later. “It’s… what are…” Shepard looked to Tali, who’d begun to unclasp her mask. “Woah, woah, put that back on, you’ll get sick!” She reached for the mask only to have her wrist caught by the semi-suited woman.

“It’s okay, Shepard. I took some medicine, I won’t get hurt.” Tali turned to the black-haired woman, a soft smile spreading across her lavender-purple cheeks. “I want this.” She reached for Amelie’s waistband, unclasping the metal hook from its ring and pulling her pants open. “I want to help you.” 

“Tali, you… really don’t have to do that.” Although Shepard was protesting, she hadn’t seen release in a long time and it was weighing on her. The Captain weighed up the pros and cons, her selfish nature fighting with her selfless nature. All of that went out the window, however, as Tali hooked her fingers under the waist of Shepard’s boxers and pulled them down, her already-hard cock springing out and lightly striking Tali’s nose. What was in her pants wasn’t exactly a monster, clocking in at around five and a half inches--perfectly average. Not that she had much to compare it to. “Fucking hell…” Amelie breathed out at the sight, something she’d seen long ago but rarely since then. What was happening now was not a common occurence, but that made her love it all the more. 

“There it is, I’d almost forgotten what it looked like.” Tali’s voice was little more than a whisper as Shepard’s member twitched in anticipation, the weeks of pent-up sexual energy flooding all at once to her cock. “Mmm, it’s been quite a while.” She spoke once more before dipping her head down, taking the head of Shepard’s member in her lips and suckling on it.

Amelie’s back arched at the contact and she strained not to thrust her hips forward, her hand flying out to stabilize her on a nearby railing, while the other tangled itself in Tali’s similarly black hair. “Fucking fuck that’s good.” After so long, she was about ready to burst just at that, but she was determined to hold out for longer. She called upon every ounce of stamina left in her as Tali took her deeper into her warm mouth, keeping it pressed between her tongue and the roof of her mouth as she bobbed up and down on Amelie’s length. “God, Tali, fuck, it’s…” Shepard grunted grunted and squeezed her eyes shut, her cock pulsing only a couple of times in warning before spilling out over Tali’s tongue. The Quarian hummed in surprise, pulling her head back to lock around the tip of the member, suckling softly to work her lover through the climax. Once Shepard had finally come down, she pulled her head back and brought her hand up to her mouth, spitting out the considerable amounts of cum that had collected in her mouth into her palm. As Shepard leaned back against the railing to catch her breath, Tali produced a small paper napkin from her back pocket and deposited the fluids into it, wiping her hand off tossing the repository into a nearby wastebin. 

“Holy shit Tali, I needed that so much.” Shepard breathed, tucking her only semi-erect cock back into her pants and zipping them back up. “I love you so much, you know that?” Amelie staggered forward and pulled Tali in for a deep kiss, taking advantage of her rare unmasked state. 

“I love you too, Shepard. I really need to get my mask back on though. And probably take some more medicine.” She seemed apologetic about it, but Amelie stepped back and allowed her to do so, taking a deep breath and running a hand through her dishevelled hair. 

“I’ll leave you to do that, I don’t want you getting more sick around me. I’m gonna go check on the rest of the crew, but don’t forget, you get the Captain’s Cabin privileges.” She winked at Tali and wiped the sheen of sweat off of her forehead, praying her legs would function properly as she headed back for the engineering deck.


	3. The Intruder

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm trying to get back on top of my WIPs. Don't you guys worry, you'll have at least another year to ponder on this piece of shit chapter while I work up the inspiration to write another one.

“Holy  _ shit _ .” Shepard whispered as she stepped through to the captain's cabin, flicking on the lights and watching as the full glory of her new bedroom jumped into existence. The desk, a real, top of the line terminal, a bed made out of a _ real _ mattress. And, best of all, the active armor locker. “I wonder what we've got in here.” She whispered to herself, making for the stairs before something in the corner caught her eye.

“No fucking way…” She stared at the open door with wide eyes. “My own shower?!” Shepard clapped her hands together in the most undignified of ways as she entered the bathroom. 

The scream was the first thing she heard, followed by a body ramming into her full force and knocking her clean over.

“Help!” The unknown intruder shouted from somewhere else in the room. “Someone help me!” 

Amelie scrambled to her feet and grabbed her sidearm from her belt, leveling it in front of her. She stepped out from behind the diving glass, glancing around the room in a bid to track down the source of the screaming.

“Hey, get your ass out here, girl!” She called out, descending the stairs and peeking into the corner with the couch. “Wow, my own couch.” Shepard whispered, shaking her head and turning her attention back to the room. Met with silence, she adjusted the grip on her weapon. “Get out here and I won’t shoot you!” She sighed in anger. 

Silence.

“Okay, let me put it another way.” Amelie slipped her finger onto the trigger. “If you come out now I won’t shoot you. If I have to find you I will.” She paused, waiting for the response that would inevitably come. Just as anticipated, the intruder crawled out from under the bed. A redheaded woman dressed in a Cerberus uniform. 

“Okay, okay, don’t shoot. Please.” She seemed terrified, her hands raised above her head. Clearly she was no threat. Traditionally, anyway. That said, anyone who knew the ship like a crew member could still cause some major problems. 

“Who are you, what are you doing here?” Amelie questioned, taking a step closer. Despite her promise, her weapon was still aimed clear at the woman’s head—more a precaution than a threat. “I thought we got rid of all the Cerberus drones here, how did you hide from our sensors?”

The woman shifted uncomfortably, shrinking away. As scared as she was, she still seemed defiant. Nonetheless, the gun in her face seemed to loosen her tongue. “I’m Yeoman Kelly Chambers, I was here getting the lay of the ship when the alarms went off so I hid. I’m not a threat, just drop me off and I’ll leave, I promise.” 

Shepard shook her head, stepping forward and grabbing the woman’s arm and pulling her back toward the door, coming up behind her and pushing the barrel of the pistol against her back. “I’m not buying it, Cerberus. You’re going down to the brig until I figure out what to do with you.”

The two began silently out into the elevator corridor when Amelie’s comm beeped in her ear. “God fucking dammit.” She whispered, opening the channel from her omnitool. “What is it?” Her tone was unecessarily harsh as the mounting irritation bubbled up through her chest. 

Garrus’s voice crackled over the outdated equipment, “Captain, I think Cerberus is tracking us. Joker picked out a signal being transmitted from somewhere below deck. We’re looking right now.” 

Without responding, Shepard closed the channel and grabbed Kelly by the collar, spinning her and shoving her against the wall, pressing the cold barrel of the handgun to the underside of her chin. The poor girl looked like she would die of fright before she could be shot, but at the moment Amelie didn’t care. “Who else is on board?!” She failed to control herself and shouted right in the poor girl's face, irritation shifting to anger.

“W-what?” Kelly whimpered, screwing her eyes shut in anticipation of the shot that would end her. 

“Someone’s transmitting our location. Who. Else. Is. Onboard?” Her voice dropped, now dangerously low and chilling. Her anger fluctuated in the face of the yeoman’s fear. Still, she remained steadfast. 

“...Transmitting…? EDI! It’s EDI!” Kelly gasped, momentarily forgetting her situation before slipping right back into the terror. “EDI is the onboard cyberwarfare suite that Miranda greenlit, she wasn’t supposed to be active but she must’ve been tripped by the alarms!” 

“Fuck!” Amelie punched the wall, sending another jolt of fear through Kelly’s body. Shepard opened the comm channel again. “Williams, get up to the captain’s cabin, I need you to take someone to the brig. I need to deal with something.” 

“Gotcha, skipper. On my way."

* * *

 

“You lying bitch!” Amelie stormed into the side room Miranda had set up in, flanked by Garrus with shotgun in hand. “You knew about this EDI shit, I should’ve known this was a setup!” She pushed the desk out of her way with a near superhuman strength and advanced on Miranda, who seemed to nearly break that calm demeanor she kept.

“EDI?” She repeated, glancing up at the ceiling. “She wasn’t supposed to be active.” The operative scratched her head, clearly confused. “Nevermind. I can deactivate her, come on.” She shrugged and started for the door before Shepard’s hand stopped her dead.

“I don’t fucking trust you, you should’ve told me. Get in there, get rid of the robot, then get the fuck to the brig with your little friend I found in my cabin.” Shepard grabbed her arm and shoved her out into the cafeteria. 

“Shepard, I didn’t lie to you, I didn’t think it would be an issue. She wasn’t supposed to be active, I don’t know what tripped her.” Miranda protested, though she complied with the gun at her back and led the two into the medbay. 

Garrus flicked his mandibles and cut in with his characteristic drawl, “Right, an AI aboard a ship would  _ never  _ cause problems for the organics, right?” He scoffed, stopping at the door to keep watch while Shepard and Miranda continued through the empty room. 

“AIs usually aren’t that dangerous when they’re inactive.” The operative shot back, punching a code in on the keypad and opening up the door to the AI core. For a moment she fiddled with a control panel before speaking up. “EDI, executive override 32, command code 0193458B, authorization Miranda Lawson.” 

The core fell silent for a moment before a disembodied voice piped through the speakers. “Command override accepted, Operative Lawson. Shutting down.” The flickering lights of the computer towers and processors dimmed to a near-darkness and the soft blue lights flicked off.    


“There we go, all sorted. Are we done here, Captain?” Miranda turned back to Garrus and Amelie, crossing her arms and assuming an unamused stance. The silence that followed was tense enough to snap.

Finally, Shepard spoke up, taking a step into the core. “Yeah, we’re done. I’m locking you in your room until we get to Omega and I have a second to think. You’d better spend that time coming up with a damn good defense or the only thing I’ll be leaving behind is your dismembered corpse, got it?” 

Miranda nodded wordlessly and brushed past Amelie, complying with the order and returning to her room, leaving Shepard and Garrus behind in the medbay. 

Another moment passed before the Turian spoke up. “Hopefully we find a doctor on Omega, this place is… creepy.” He muttered, glancing around at the vacant beds and pristine medical tools. As usual, his jokes set Amelie in a better mood than she’d been in. 

“I’ll add it to the list. Make sure Williams gets familiar with the kitchen and keep Miss Tits locked up, I don’t want another emergency contact. If someone dies I’ll be up in the cabin, got it?” 

“Aye aye, Captain Sir.”


	4. Connections

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have nothing to say about this one. 
> 
> Enjoy!

The Normandy, after almost an hour’s flight, docked in Omega. Amelie, on the other hand, was fast asleep in her new bed, lulled into a near-coma by the beautiful silence of the cabin. It had been quite some time since she’d been able to sleep somewhere quiet, and the  _ Normandy  _ was the perfect place for that. 

“Captain, we’ve arrived at Omega, the crew’s waiting for orders.” Joker’s voice sprung to life in the cabin, but was met with dead silence as Shepard continued sleeping peacefully.

“Uh… Captain?” The pilot tried again, but, once again, found no response from the woman of the hour. A moment later, a scuffle ensued over the speakers before another voice, decidedly louder, spoke up.

“Shepard!” Tali’s voice shouted into the cabin, jolting Amelie from her sleep. From pure instinct she sprung to her feet, looking around the cabin bewilderedly before her mind woke up alongside her and she realized just what was going on.

Shepard looked up to the ceiling, unsure of where the comms were. For a moment she remained silent but spoke up experimentally before the silence dragged on too long. “What happened?” Her voice was uncertain, but as the response came through her worries dissipated. 

“We’re at Omega.” Tali reiterated Joker’s point, much quieter than she had before. “You should come tell the crew what to do before Garrus walks off to Afterlife.” 

Shepard nodded and adjusted her shirt, grabbing her sweater from the couch she’d haphazardly thrown it upon, pulling it over her head and grabbing her vest from over the back of the chair. “On my way.” 

With those words she was out the door, her boots clicking through the ghostly silence. While sleeping in full gear kept things expident, she almost felt wrongg being so disrespectful to such a beautiful ship. Even the stark wires and tubes that ran unobscured across the walls had an appealingly sleek appearance to them.

Amelie stepped into the elevator and tapped the touchscreen, strapping on her vest on the way down. If this were the Citadel she wouldn’t need such protection, but considering the climate of Omega, it seemed keen to bring that bit of extra protection with her.

The elevator doors slid open with a quiet hiss and the captain stepped out into the CIC where the sparse crew had already gathered. She stepped up to the group and crossed her arms over her chest. “Right guys, we’re here to do some business, not get hammered. At least not until we’re done with the business.” She smirked, beginning to pace back and forth as she always did when giving out orders. “Garrus, you’re familiar with the weapons systems. I want you to pay Harrot a visit and buy any tools you need to keep them running. Tali, you go with him and pick up anything you need for the engines.” The two nodded in tandem, Garrus giving a thumbs up in acknowledgement. “Charge it to my account, with luck I’ll have enough to cover it by time we leave here.”

“Williams, I need you to go pick up cooking supplies for the ship. Joker, you’re off the hook, do whatever the hell you want.” Ashley seemed a bit upset at the request but didn’t argue, simply giving a resigned sigh that barely caught the attention of anyone around her. “Once you’re done with that you’re free to do whatever you want. We’ll meet back here tomorrow night. If you need me I’m always on comms, blah blah you remember. C’mon, let’s go.” The group all began at once toward the airlock, save for Joker, who simply kept walking back to the cockpit. 

Shepard paused as the others went ahead, doubling back to the pilot. “You coming or what?” She cocked her head to the side as she watched him sit down in the cockpit, bringing up the console once again. “Or are you planning to steal the ship out from under me?” Amelie smirked, watching him closely nonetheless. 

“Nah, just figured I’d stick around, get myself acquainted with this baby.” He shot back, bringing up menu after menu that made Shepard’s head hurt to look at. He paused for a moment, glancing over his shoulder. “The beeping’s about to start again. You might want to get out of here.”

Amelie chuckled and nodded, stepping back out of the cockpit. “Will do. Go get Tits and give her a gun before you start, would you? I don’t want Batarians showing up and taking my ship. Tell her I’ll be back tonight to discuss things.”

Joker waved his hand back at her. “Alright, mom, love you.”

Shepard smiled and shook her head, stepping into the airlock and shutting the door behind her.

* * *

 

The shift to Omega’s streets was jarring to say the least. The soft, cool lights of the Normandy had been supplanted by the harsh red, though she wasn’t certain if it was from the star or the gratuitous red lights that lined the corridors, presumably because Aria wanted it to look as evil as possible.

Amelie began on her way through the streets and alleys, weaving through them with the familiarity of someone who’d lived their whole life on the station. Granted, she’d been here more times than she could count, but her knowledge of the station’s layout managed to surprise her. 

Eventually, she reached her destination, squeezing past a group of vorcha rather preoccupied with a decades-old defunct mech and finding herself face to face with a rather nondescript door, ordinary in its every way if it weren’t tucked behind a web of pipes and maintenence panels. 

She knocked three times and tapped lightly once with her knuckle. Nearly a minute of silence passed before the door hissed open and Shepard found herself face to face with an old friend. The Asari seemed young and even innocent on the outside, but years of knowing her had taught Amelie better. “Liara, I was hoping you were still in business.” Shepard smiled, brushing past her and stepping into the room. The walls were positively covered in vidscreens, each one displaying a unique data stream or security feed. Tucked in the back between rows of filing cabinets, server towers, and paper stacks was a single cot and a minifridge. 

“Shepard, how nice to see you again.” Liara’s deceptively small and soft voice rang from behind her, barely audible over the whirring of the room full of machines. Even with the massive fans, the area was still an ungodly amount of hot. “I assume this isn’t a social visit?” She followed up, pulling out one of her chairs and taking a seat. “What can I do for you?”

Amelie crossed her arms and shifted her weight onto her back foot. “I’m sure you saw me come in to dock, we’ve got a nice new ship but nobody to fill it up with. As I recall, last time around I had you looking at some potential… friends for me?” Although she knew the only place more secret than the current room was a coffin in deep space, she found herself falling back on coy words.

Liara laughed softly and grabbed a datapad from the center of a massive, organized stack, tossing it across to the captain. “Everyone I found is on there. Do you have the credits to pay for them after acquiring your new ship?” The Asari tilted her head, gesturing to one of the many video screens that showed the various ports on the station. 

“The ship was free, but I racked up some… other expenses. In other words my old ship got blown up an I left my chit there.” Shepard rubbed the back of her neck with one hand, placing the datapad in her bag with the other. “If you’ve got any leads I’d be happy to take them, I’ve got a day to kill here.” She paused before she chuckled, “Literally.”

Liara held her smile, producing a second datapad from the indistinct stacks. “You’re in luck, I think I have a way right here for you to make all of that back and then some.” She stood, approaching Amelie and handing her the second datapad. 

Shepard took it from her hands and looked it over, pursing her lips as she perused the information. “Alliance soldier, huh? I thought they didn’t negotiate with terrorists like a bunch of pussies.”

“This isn’t a negotiation with the Alliance.” Liara clarified, tilting her head to get a better look at the datapad and pointing to one of the numbers on it. “He won a pretty sizeable lawsuit against the Sirta Foundation.”

“Holy shit.” Shepard whispered, looking it over several times. “And you’re just giving this to me?” She furrowed her brow and looked up at Liara, clearly confused.

“Well I  _ do  _ expect a cut, obviously.” 

Shepard snickered and nodded, “Hey, I might be a pirate but I’m not an asshole, of course you’ll get a cut. I’ll take a look at this. Thanks Liara, the help’s always appreciated.” She patted the Asari on the shoulder and pocketed the second datapad. “I should get going if I’m going to be going through this roster any time soon. I’ll be in contact, hopefully with some money for you.”

“I will be in touch as well. Goodbye.” Liara smiled once again and returned to her work as Shepard stepped out of her apartment just in time for the comms to crackle to life in her ear. 

“Uh, Shepard? I think you might want to get down here.” Garrus spoke over the link. 

Shit.


	5. Tunnel Vision

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've discovered a writing magic trick that expands my chapters by at least 2,000 words and it could be YOURS for FREE, writers hate me! [Click here to learn my secret!](https://imgur.com/a/E6YCnwL)
> 
> Also no cliffhanger this time yaaaaaaay.

Amelie wove her way back through the winding maintenance tunnels of Omega, dodging beggars and pushy aliens as she made a beeline for the spaceport marketplace. Although she trusted her team, _especially_ Tali and Garrus to handle whatever was thrown their way, the fact that Garrus felt the need to alert her to whatever was happening put her on edge nonetheless. The both of them had been known to end up in full-blown firefights only for her to find out after the fact.

Finally, after several dead ends and a particularly shouty Vorcha, Shepard manouvered her way to the spaceport marketplace. It became immediately obvious what it was Garrus wanted her to see. A crowd had formed around the spectacle just outside of Harrot’s Emporium, watching on in morbid interest as the scene unfolded in front of them.

Her two crewmates had somehow managed to pick a fight in the middle of the marketplace. Tali and Garrus had entered an all-out brawl with a particularly ugly Batarian. The crowd seemed to be cheering and placing bets as Garrus held the alien by the arms and let Tali punch him repeatedly in the stomach. The man, however, didn’t take the beating with grace, cracking the back of his head against Garrus’s faceplate and breaking free of the hold as the Turian went reeling. His next punch went directly to Tali’s face and a distinct crack of glass rang through the market area.

Shepard’s heart sunk and she felt herself lurch forward, pausing only for a fraction of a moment before she shoved her way through the crowd, eliciting several irritated grumbles that barely reached her ears through the sound of hear heart pumping. As she reached the scene the Batarian had turned to face Garrus, but was clearly not expecting a new fighter. Amelie shouted as she drove her fist into the side of his head, knocking him to the ground in a daze. Far from willing to let the man go, she swung her leg up, the tip of her boot making contact with his jaw. A wet _crunch_ echoed through the marketplace to the apparent delight of the spectators, who erupted in a wave of cheers—praise she would’ve basked in if her heart weren’t threatening to rip itself from her chest.

Barely stopping to check on the downed man, she rushed to Tali’s side, placing a shaking hand on her shoulder. “Are you alright?” Her voice was strained with worry, trying to duck her head and get a look at whatever damage might’ve been done to her visor.

Tali looked up at Amelie, a smile barely visible through the solid purple glass of her mask. It seemed that, whatever the noise had been, it hadn’t been Tali. “I’m fine, Shepard.” Her voice was slightly weak as she clutched the side of her head. “I think I have a concussion though.” She shook her head slightly, staggering up to her feet with Shepard’s help.

“Outraged; you broke my kiosk.” The telltale monotone of an Elcor’s voice hummed over the three as the group of onlookers dispersed. Amelie looked up to Harrot, brows knit in a scowl. The Elcor seemed to shy away, flattening his mouth flaps against his face.

“Yeah, and you’re lucky I don’t blow this Batarian’s brains out all over your floor for you to clean up, you’re welcome.” She jerked her head to Garrus, who nodded wordlessly and grabbed the still-dazed alien by the collar of his shirt and dragged him after the captain and Tali, his clothes squeaking on the metal floors.

The four trudged out of the marketplace, interest in the debacle having finally died down. Left well alone, they returned to the _Normandy_ , Tali’s arm slung over Shepard’s shoulder. What would often draw attention in any civilized place was clearly an everyday occurrence on the station, as they only drew a handful of disinterested glances from passerby on their way back to the spaceport proper.

Amelie punched in the code to the airlock, wincing at the loud hydraulic hiss as it slid open for the ‘away team’, as the computer called them. All four stood awkwardly as the decontamination screening began, the Batarian seemingly having either resigned himself to his fate or passed away, as his kicking and struggling had trickled to a halt. Eventually the door to the ship opened for them and they stepped through onto the flight deck.

Shepard turned back to Garrus, hefting Tali a bit higher on her shoulder. “Tie that fucker up in the hangar and then come see me in the medbay.” Her voice was curt, but not harsh, her frayed nerves clear for anyone to see.

Garrus gave a little mock salute as he always did, somewhere between sarcasm and respect. “Aye aye, skipper.” He stepped around Amelie, grabbing the Batarian by the arm and hoisting him over his shoulder. As the two disappeared further into the CIC, she caught the words ‘never saying that again’ from the Turian. Despite herself, she cracked a small smile before glancing over to Tali, who seemed to be fading in and out of coherence as she mumbled to herself.

“Alright, c’mon, I’m sure there’s supplies in the medbay.” She tried to keep the shakes out of her voice for Tali’s sake, but it didn’t seem the Quarian was of much mind to notice something as subtle as that. Amelie was almost startled by a louder-than-necessary noise of protest.

“No, it… suh… it’s scary. Without lights.” Tali stumbled over her words, blinking hard and trying to clear her head. “Or doctors.” She amended, her feet dragging against the floor slightly. Instead of making her laugh, as it usually would, Shepard was only more worried about whatever damage might’ve been incurred during the fight.

That Batarian was going to pay, that much was certain, but crushing his knees and shooting him in the head wouldn’t fix the problem at hand. After everything she’d endured, she was determined not to lose Tali, not after everything, but a worry that she wouldn’t be able to fix whatever had happened gnawed at her gut. The way the Quarian was groaning and staggering shot a bolt of fear through her heart. She wasn’t a doctor but she remembered reading about much worse things than a concussion that could happen. Swelling, skull fractures, hemorrhages, something that could kill her, or at _least_ leave her damaged for the rest of her life.

They passed through the CIC where they caught Miranda as a tail who followed them to the elevator. “What happened out there, Shepard? Who’s the Batarian?” Her voice was hardly as slick as it usually was, but it still held a bit of a superior tone. _Probably trained herself by being a stuck up bitch for years._ Amelie thought to herself, dragging Tali into the elevator and hitting the button, internally groaning as their unwanted companion slipped in. “Is she alright?”

Shepard looked over to the newest addition to the debacle, internally struggling between telling the truth and telling her fuck off. Eventually, reason won out. “Fuck off.” She muttered, her accented tongue tripping slightly over the words. With a sigh, she shifted Tali’s arm on her shoulder. A silence fell over them as the elevator slid to a halt silently. Amelie stil found herself expecting a grinding and a worrying thump like the elevator on the _Phalanx_.

The three stepped out and made for the medbay. As they passed by the cafeteria tables, Miranda joined Shepard in supporting the Quarian. Quietly, she grunted in acknowledgement of the help, hitting the door’s mechanism with her boot and struggling Tali over to the bed, where they laid her out. The lights overhead faded slowly in, but she threw a hand up over her eyes. “Nngh, too bright.”

“Bright, shit.” Amelie turned back to the lighting panel, looking in confusion over the options. “Uhh…” She tapped one of the buttons, recoiling a bit as the panel beeped. A moment later the lights clicked off, leaving them in the dark save for the glow of the various display panels around the room. “That’s not it.” She muttered, tapping the same button and watching the light return to the room.

“Let me see.” Miranda approached, not bothering to wait for Shepard to step out of the way before pushing her aside. Begrudgingly, the Captain allowed it, crossing her arms as she watched Miranda’s gloved fingers navigate the interface with practice, bringing up a slider and dimming the lights. “There we go.”

“Hmph.” Amelie returned to Tali, taking her hand tenderly and lacing her five fingers between the Quarian’s three. Although she seemed to still be conscious, she was fading in and out, mumbling and groaning under her breath. The hum and crackle of her mask’s voice filter filled the immediate area, bouncing off the bare walls of the medbay.

“What happened?” Miranda reiterated with a bit more force, leaning down to catch Shepard’s eye. With a sigh, the woman looked up to to her, rolling her shoulders back. For several seconds she was quiet, evidently trying to decide what to do.

“She got punched. Hard.” Shepard looked back to the door, running her thumb over Tali’s knuckle. “That fucking Batarian did it. I don’t…” She took a shaky breath, swallowing audibly. “I don’t know what’s wrong.” Her voice was small as she admitted it, obviously uncomfortable acknowledging her own helplessness.

Miranda quirked her mouth, examining the Quarian. “If we can’t remove her mask I won’t be able to tell either.” She fell silent in thought as Amelie watched Tali with concern, her eyes hardly leaving the purple-tinted mask. “If we…” Miranda finally spoke back up, looking at the doors behind her. “EDI can scan her. If we bring her back online, we can—”

“No.” Shepard snapped, staring at Miranda with hard eyes. “That thing was sending our location to Cerberus, if we activate it again it’ll just start doing that again and I’m not about to let my new ship be taken by those bastards.”

Miranda shook her head, “I can use my override, she’s still shackled, she still has to obey me. EDI can diagnose her, suggest a treatment. If you really want, we’ll turn her off right after.”

Amelie chewed on her lip, staring down at her hand. “I don’t fucking trust you.” She paused but looked up at the woman, who raised her chin indignantly. “But I love Tali more. Turn her on.” She jerked her head toward the door, pulling up a chair and taking a seat as Miranda disappeared into the AI core.

A few tense seconds passed before a loud _thunk_ and a hum filled the room. Over the speakers a voice sprung to life. “Enhanced Defense Intelligence system online. Assessing integrity of _Normandy_ systems. Done. Scanning for threats. Done. Establishing link to Cerberus. Error, overridden.” The voice paused for a moment before it returned, “What do you require, Captain Shepard?”

Amelie paused for a moment, looking around the room and then back at Tali. “Uh… I need you to figure out what’s going on with Tali. Here.” She pointed at the Quarian in case the AI was watching. An uncomfortable silence filled the room before an instrument on the bed whirred to life suddenly, making Shepard jump. A purple light clicked on and began sweeping over Tali’s body before suddenly turning off.

“The Quarian appears to be suffering from a severe concussion.” Relief washed over Amelie as the diagnosis came. Concussions were bad, but she knew how to deal with them. Fistfights had always been common and so were injuries in friends that got into them. “I would suggest simply allowing her to rest. If you would like, I can keep her under observation.”

Miranda returned to the medbay, approaching the other side of the bed and glancing to Shepard. “I altered her protocols. EDI knows you’re the Captain of this ship. She’ll follow any orders you give her.” The two locked eyes for a moment before she continued. “I can turn her off if you really want, but this ship was designed around her. It’ll be a lot easier for you to run it with her active.”

Shepard glanced around, tapping her foot in thought. Finally, she broke her silence, looking up at the ceiling. “Keep watching her and let me know if anything gets worse.” She looked back to Miranda. “We’ll give it a trial run, but if it goes crazy and tries to kill us or starts transmitting to Cerberus again, it’s not the only thing we’re sending out the airlock.” She glared pointedly at the operative.

“I understand, Shepard. You won’t regret the decision.” She placed her hands on her hips and Shepard had to keep herself from staring at them. Amelie had made herself clear, but _damn_ if she wasn’t distracting.

She shook her head softly and dragged her eyes up to Miranda’s. “Stay here with Tali for a few. I’m going to go deal with the little fucking rat that did this.” Shepard pushed up to her feet, leaning over and pressing a kiss to Tali’s visor, who hummed softly in response. While she wouldn’t usually be so affectionate in front of others, especially someone she barely knew, she found herself not caring for once.

“Of course, Shepard.” Miranda took her place in the seat, crossing her legs and bringing up her omni-tool.

* * *

 

Amelie stepped out of the medbay, closing the door behind her and starting for the elevator as her communicator beeped. Bringing up her omni-tool, she accepted the call, “What is it?” She continued for the elevator as it was relayed to her earpiece, stepping inside and hitting the button for the hangar bay.

“So, did you turn on the crazy murder-bot, or is am I hallucinating this thing calling you Captain?” Joker’s voice carried over the comms, the droning of the AI’s voice clear in the background. “Yeah yeah, totally.” He seemed to direct his platitude at the bot.

“I turned it on, yeah. Or, well, Miranda did. Apparently it’s on our side now but I wouldn’t trust it too much yet.” She glanced around the elevator, still a bit nervous that it was about to release the maglocks and crush her to death.

“Right, because this isn’t going to backfire.” A clattering noise carried over the link as the beeping began again. “Hey, leave that alone!” Joker shouted over the din, the sound dying off as quickly as it’d started. “Listen, Captain, I gotta go, the murder bot is trying to change all my settings. Keep an eye on the thermostats.” The comm link was terminated and Shepard chuckled. A moment later the elevator doors opened.

In the center of the hangar Garrus stood over the Batarian who had been lashed to a chair in several different places. Judging by the scattered tools and parts, he’d fought back, at least for a moment. Shepard approached, leaning on one of the consoles and clearing her throat. Garrus lifted his head and looked back to her, his mandibles flaring. “Oh, hey there. Juuuust finishing up here.” He turned his attention back to the Batarian, tightening what appeared to be a leather belt in his mouth.

“Uh, you know he’s going to chew through that, right?” Shepard observed, pointing at him. Garrus shot her a confused look and she clarified, “Batarian teeth.” Her voiced carried a smile as he looked back to the captive with a sigh. “Don’t worry about it, let him.” She waved her hand, jerking her head to him in a silent gesture.

The Turian sauntered over to her, leaning on the opposite console. “Can I stay and watch or is this a private show?” His left mandible flared in a smirk as he crossed his arms and legs, glancing over to the Batarian.

Shepard followed his eyes, shrugging. “Might get a bit messy but if you really want to…” Amelie chuckled, looking back to him. “So what happened, why were you fighting him?” The burning question was finally out and she felt a bit of relief that she finally got to ask.

Garrus laughed quietly, raising his brows. “You’re not gonna like this.” He paused for effect, watching Shepard’s expression grow darker before he continued. “He grabbed her ass and tried to rip her suit so he could ‘get a handful’, so Tali punched him. It kind of… what is it you say? Snowmanned from there.” He spoke with confidence, even nodding his head.

Indeed, Amelie did _not_ like that and she felt anger boiling up in her chest. Half of her wanted to push up off the console and beat him to a bleeding mess that very moment, but she restrained herself, taking several deep breaths and slowly releasing the tension from her shoulders. “Snowballed.” She corrected, pushing up to her feet.

Garrus hummed as she approached the Batarian, unfastening the belt and pulling it harshly from between his teeth, the buckle clinking loudly against his teeth. Indeed, the leather seemed to bear many teeth marks and was growing rather thin. The captive snarled at her before smirking. “Well, another girlie. What are you gonna do, suck my cock until I give up?” His grin was massive, even after she sunk her fist into the side of his face. “Pathetic. That all you can do, honey?”

Amelie hissed, shaking her life. “Oh, you are gonna _regret_ not shutting the fuck up.” She approached the table Garrus had set up behind them, deliberately out of sight and reach of the captive.

“Your little Quarian couldn’t do shit to me, what could you do? How about you take off those pants and we’ll make up.” He craned his neck in an attempt to see behind him. Across the room, Garrus seemed nearly ready to break his face himself, but simply watched as Shepard returned, a rather large hammer in her hand.

With a smirk on her face at the falling of the Batarian’s expression, she smacked the head of the hammer into the palm of her hand.

“Now, which knee do you use the least?”

* * *

 

Amelie accepted the rag and wiped the blood and sweat from her face before setting it down and beginning to wrap her bloodied knuckles. Behind her, the Batarian groaned, his wheezing audible through his swollen nose and mouth. She locked eyes with Garrus, smiling cruelly. “Go ahead and lock everything down and vent the hangar.”

“Gladly.” He began for the captive, but was stopped by Shepard’s hand on his arm. He turned back to face her, looking down at the shorter woman.

She looked up at him with a far softer smile on his face. “Thanks for helping Tali, seriously. She’s a good fighter but that suit of hers is way too fragile.”

“Of course. Honestly, I kinda wanted to beat him up anyway.”

Shepard laughed and patted him on the arm. “‘Course you did.” She glanced back to the bleeding, agonized result of her work. “Come see me in the medbay when you’re done here, we’ve got a job that’ll net us the credits for a real crew.”

“Sure thing, Shepard.” He nodded and resumed his walk to the captive, patting him on the back gently as he gathered up the various instruments on the table.

Amelie bit off the bandages and tied them off, flexing her hand tenderly before beginning back up to the elevator.

For once, the ride was uninterrupted and she soon found herself back in the mess hall. Without pausing, she returned to the medbay, giving Ashley a small nod as she passed.

The doors hissed open and Miranda looked up, still on her omni tool as if no time at all had passed since Shepard had left. “You’re back.” She looked down at Shepard’s hand, “And I see you had some fun.”

Amelie raised her injured hand with a grunt, approaching the bed. “I’ll take over here,” she paused, shifting uncomfortably. “and consider yourself off confinement. Thanks for the help.” She took Miranda’s seat as the woman stood up, circling around the bed to give her more space.

“Of course. I told you, Shepard. I’m in this for real.” Miranda shut down her omni-tool, watching the two. “Is there anything you need me to do?”

Shepard nodded, kicking her feet up on the empty bed next to her. “Yeah, there’s a prisoner down in the brig. You knew the crew here, I need you to go figure out what we’re gonna do with her. I don’t really want to kill her if we don’t have to.” Amelie shrugged, laying her hand over Tali’s.

“I’ll get right on it.” Miranda nodded and stepped away, disappearing from the medbay. As the doors hissed closed behind her, leaving the two alone in the silent room.

Shepard sighed and stared at Tali for a moment. She seemed to be sleeping peacefully, eyes closed and chest rising and falling gently. A familiar feeling of love filled her chest and she gripped Tali’s hand gently, wincing slightly as she irritated her wounds. “I love you so much.” She whispered, shifting in the chair. “Thanks for not dying.”

Falling back into silence, she leaned back in her chair, letting her head hang back as she drifted off to sleep to the sound of Tali’s soft breathing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My chapters always feel incomplete unless i have something here.


	6. Chatte

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this one took way too fucking long on account of the persistent panic attack I had for like three days that I'm still kinda feeling. Have fun with this, it's 4500 words long which is my current record!

“Shepard.”

Amelie stirred, groaning and shifting in her seat. Her brow furrowed and she tightened her arm over her chest. A moment of silence passed before she sighed quietly, signaling a return to a comfortable sleep. 

“Shepard.”

She lifted her head for a second before laying back. “Mmn.  _ Va te faire foutre.”  _ Her head sagged to the side and she made a little noise in the back of her throat. 

“Shepard!”

The voice finally snapped her out of the sleep trance she'd put herself in, snorting rather crudely and snapping upright, her eyes darting around the room as she tried to identify the source of the shouting. Through a blurry film she could vaguely make out the shape of a blue and gray blob. She blinked several times, dropping her feet to the floor and rubbing her face tiredly. Turning her face up, she caught Garrus’s eye as he fluttered a mandible, glancing to Tali. “Mmph. How long was I out.”

The Turian shrugged, crossing his arms and tilting his head down to look at the Quarian on the medical bed. “Is she going to be alright?” He gestured to her sleeping form, his browplates knit in slight worry. 

Amelie ran a hand down her face, mirroring his worry as she looked to Tali. “Probably. EDI says it’s just a bad concussion. She’s been sleeping for…” She brought up her omni tool, glancing at the time in the top corner. Her face remained still while she ran the numbers through her head. “Two hours, now.” Shepard closed the tool, sighing quietly. “Which means I was asleep for about twenty minutes.” She muttered under her breath. 

“Good.” He opened his mouth to continue but cut himself off, “Well, not  _ good _ .” He shrugged and looked back to Shepard, meeting her discomfort with a soft—if slightly terrifying—smile. “She’ll be fine. Remember the time she got caught by that grenade?” His subvocals rumbled in amusement.

As the memory flashed through her head, Amelie couldn’t help but laugh as well, running a hand through her hair. “Her mask was shattered, her suit got torn up, and she just kept going.” She looked to Tali fondly, her laughter shifting into a soft smile. “I guess you’re right, she’ll be fine.” Shepard grunted slightly as she stood up, “I think her immune system might be getting better. I don’t even think she got sick when—” She spoke without thinking before quickly cutting herself with a strangled noise. 

Garrus laughed under his breath. Too late. “When what, Shepard?” His voice carried more than a hint of amusement as he crossed his arms and tilted his chin down to look at her with a shadowed gaze. 

Amelie coughed and mumbled over her shoulder, running a thumb up and down the bridge of her nose as she always did when she was cornered. “When we were… kissing.” She shifted uncomfortably. Although Garrus was the only one she’d ever discussed her relationship with, anything further than surface-level ribbing set her off balance. 

“Something tells me she was the only one doing the kissing.” His mandibles fluttered as he clapped her on the shoulder. “Come on, let’s see if Ashley managed to figure out the kitchen.” He guided a stiff Shepard from the room, lowering the lights behind him as they stepped out into the mess hall.

Ashley looked up from the kitchen island, surrounded by several bags and boxes. “Hey, skipper! I got everything you asked for. They didn’t have much.” She cringed slightly as she held up what appeared to be some sort of large, pickled bug in a jar. 

The two stopped in their tracks and Shepard shot him a side-eyed look, shaking her head slightly as he gave a nervous flick of his mandible. They reached a quiet conclusion to their conversation and approached the island. Amelie rested her palms on the counter, looking over the bounty of food. A package of mystery meat, the pickled insect, several jars of colored, viscous liquids, and a bushel of preserved vegetables. Certainly anything but a king’s feast. 

As a sizzling began from the stove, an overwhelming smell hit Amelie directly in the face like a wave and she wrinkled her nose, pressing the back of her hand against her face. “Fucking Christ, what  _ is  _ that?” She looked up to Garrus, who also seemed to be puzzling it out. The two had certainly smelled worse in their lives, but that smell usually came with a corpse in a sewer. 

Even the chef seemed taken aback by the smell, coughing several times and pulling the pan off the stove, disposing of the slimy, almost  _ hairy _ mass in the trashcan beneath the sink. For a few moments the smell lingered before the ventilation system kicked on and diluted it with cool air. “That’s the last time I trust a vorcha.” Ashley muttered, kicking the cabinet closed and turning back to the food.

Shepard couldn’t help a small laugh at that, shaking her head slightly. “Vorcha? I think I saw one of them trying to sell a dead rat they found in a pile of garbage as ‘gourmet livestock’ once.” She shook her head with a smile as Garrus barked out a laugh. 

“Sorry skipper, I don’t know how much of this stuff is going to smell like…” She coughed as another surge of putrid air hit them, her eyes watering. Rather than a rotting corpse, the smell now had become as if someone had urinated in a bottle of vinegar. “ _ That _ .” Ashley pinched her nose and tried to find the source of the smell

_ “Captain Shepard, I believe the smell is coming from the pickled Ontarom beetle.”  _ EDI’s soft voice rolled through the mess hall, giving Garrus a start. All eyes were instantly on the ceiling and the smell, for the moment had been forgotten.

“Uh, did the crazy AI turn itself back on?” Garrus muttered, reaching for his sidearm. Ashley, similarly, went for the gun she was known to keep near her counter.

Amelie shook her head and waved the question off, turning to the bug in the jar and grabbing it tenderly. “Miranda turned it back on to help us with Tali. Apparently it’s programmed to respond to my every command. Or something.” She opened the refrigerator with her boot and slid it into one of the crisper drawers, grabbing a nutrient bar on her way back out. Shepard looked up to the ceiling. “EDI. Say  _ chatte. _ ” Her face was split with a wide grin as a silence hung over the room. 

_ “Captain Shepard, I do not believe that is necessary.”  _ The AI spoke up after a moment. 

“EDI.” Shepard chastised, splitting the aluminum packaging and taking a bite as a silence hung over the mess hall once again, broken only by the crunching of the nutrient bar in Amelie’s mouth. 

After several seconds and an uncomfortable shifting from Ashley and Garrus, EDI spoke up once again. 

_ “Chatte. _ ” EDI finally spoke up, her voice deadpan and almost  _ annoyed _ . Triumphantly, Shepard clapped, turning back to her crew and shrugging. 

“See?” She approached Garrus and leaned up against the island, looking up at the ceiling with a smug grin. 

“What did that mean?” Ashley spoke up behind her, trying to catch her eye for a moment. Shepard only chuckled quietly, drawing confused looks from the two of them. Obviously they weren’t about to get an answer out of her. 

“Anyway.” Amelie set aside her empty wrapper and left Ashley to bus it away into the trash can with a slightly irritated look. “I told you I had something I needed to talk to you about, Garrus.” She wiped her mouth with the back of her hand and turned to the Turian, rummaging around in her bag for a moment before producing a datapad. “I talked with Liara, she’s got a lead on a  _ huge  _ score.” She held out the datapad to Garrus, who gladly accepted it.

After a moment, his mandibles flared in surprise as his eyes tracked over the number in the middle of one of the paragraphs. “Is that even a real number?” He seemed to be having trouble keeping the wonder out of his voice, scrolling for a moment through the rest of the information before looking back up at Shepard. Ashley was none too subtly listening in, washing the same spatula several times over. 

Paying her no mind, Amelie gave a nod, taking the datapad back and slipping it into her bag. “Yep, at least that’s what Liara said. Apparently the guy’s been hanging out in Afterlife a lot. I say we nab him and see if we can’t pull that out of him.” She crossed her arms, rolling her shoulders back. 

Garrus nodded slightly, glancing over to Ashley’s back. “We’re gonna need a second set of hands on this one. If this guy’s really an Alliance soldier…” He trailed off, giving a pointed look to Shepard. Ashley seemed to perk up at that. “With Tali out of commission, and… well, Joker can’t exactly help us out here.” 

Amelie narrowed her eyes at him, opening her mouth to deny him before she caught herself. She’d made the mistake of not trusting Miranda before. She shut her mouth again, scowling slightly and taking a deep breath. “Williams, you up for it?” Her voice almost seemed strained, but she managed to get the words out without sounding too put-off by the idea. 

Ashley nearly jumped at the request, spinning around on her heel with a barely hidden smile on her face. “You got it skipper, whatever you need.”

With a slight nod, Shepard took a step back from the island. “Alright then. It’s been a long day, let’s all get some rest. We’ll meet up on the bridge tomorrow morning. I expect you both to be suited up, we need to catch this guy before he fucks off.” 

The two of them nodded—Ashley a bit more enthusiastically than Garrus—before they both made for their respective living quarters. Garrus the gun battery and Ashley the barracks. Shepard herself began for the elevator before she paused, turning back to the medbay without even thinking and stepping back inside.

Tali looked up at the new intruder, propped up on one elbow with a hand over her eyes. Shepard was at her side in an instant, placing a hand on her back to help keep her upright. “Hey, you should be asleep.” She kept her voice quiet. 

“Guh… what happened?” The Quarian muttered, her mask clicking as it processed her voice through it. “I remember the Batarian, and then…” She shook her head, squinting softly. 

“He punched you in the face. You got a pretty nasty concussion but your suit’s fine.” She stepped back as Tali swung her legs over the side of the bed, though she stayed close enough to keep her from standing. “You should really still be laying down.” She layed a hand on her upper arm.

“It’s okay, I can walk.” Tali protested, trying to stand up, but the firm hand on her arm kept her down on the bed. She met Amelie’s concerned gaze and relaxed back, taking a deep breath. “Can we at least go to the cabin? It’s too quiet in here.” 

Amelie glanced up at the ceiling again. “Is that alright, EDI?” Her voice was less deragatory than before, carrying a hint of worry with it, though it was suppressed with an obvious practice.

_ “Yes, Captain Shepard.”  _

Tali seemed bewildered by the third voice, looking around the room. “Who said…”

“Long story.” Shepard cut her off, snaking an arm around her waist. “Come on, let’s get you on your feet. The cabin is  _ really  _ nice.” She helped Tali to her feet, securing her arm around her before beginning for the door. 

“I’m—” Whatever Tali was saying was cut off as she stumbled, clearly not quite 100% yet. Amelie stopped in her tracks, stepping back to meet Tali.

“You still can’t walk. Here.” She bent down, drawing a confused noise from the Quarian. Bracing her other arm against the back of her knees, Shepard lifted her up with a groan, one hand against her back and the other against the back of her thighs. Tali made a warbling, surprised noise as she was lifted, wrapping her arms instinctively around Amelie’s neck.

“Shepard!” She half-protested, looking up into her face. “I can walk you know!” The Quarian had difficulty keeping the amusement out of her voice, and she seemed to relax into Shepard’s arms almost instinctively. “Put me down.” She slapped her on the back lightly, but her demands were ignored. 

“Sorry, I don’t negotiate with pirates.” Amelie snickered and approached the door, which seemed to open by herself. “Thanks, EDI.” She spoke over her shoulder, already certain of why it had opened so easily. 

_ “Of course, Captain.” _

Tali groaned, burying her visor in the crook of Shepard’s neck. Although the glass was cold, she barely flinched. “It’s so bright.” She complained with a sigh. 

“Just keep your eyes closed, we can dim the lights when we get up to the cabin.” Her voice was soft and comforting as she approached the elevator which, just as the medbay door, opened on its own. 

The trip to the cabin continued much the same and, upon stepping inside, the two found the lights had already been dimmed for them. Amelie felt an uncomfortable weight in her stomach. She was finding herself to be wrong about a lot of things lately. “Hey.” She shrugged her shoulder against Tali's head. “Check it out.”

The Quarian looked up, blinking quickly to adjust her eyes. A moment passed before she gasped slightly, “Wow.” She carried wonder in her voice as she surveyed their new cabin. The display case, the  _ real _ desk, the bed made out of a  _ real _ bed frame.

Shepard laughed and carried her toward the bed. “I know, right? I've gotta thank Miranda for this. Maybe I'll see her head get as big as her tits.” She snickered, laying Tali down on the bed carefully, adjusting the pillow beneath her head to avoid the wires and tubes at the back of her mask. 

“Try not to thank her too hard.” Tali seemed to be joking, though worry couldn't help but creep into her voice. Amelie's smile disappeared as she rounded the bed and climbed up onto the comforter, propping herself up against the headboard and crossing her legs in front of her.

Shepard looked across to Tali, reaching out and taking her hand. “Hey. You know I'm not going to do anything, right?” She paused a moment at the slightly confused look she was given. “With Miranda I mean.”

The sheets rustled underneath Tali as she shifted uncomfortably. “You say that, but…” She paused and made a little noise in the back of her throat. “Are you tired of me, Amelie?” For the first time in months, she used Shepard's first name. Before Amelie could respond, she continued, “It's been years and I've been in this suit all the time. You—”

She was silenced as a hand appeared over the front of her visor. Her eyes tracked from the hand to Shepard’s face, who looked a bit disappointed her dramatic gesture hadn't gone as well as it had in her head. “Eh… you get my point.” She pulled her hand back and used the sleeve of her sweater to wipe the smudges off the glass before continuing. “I'm not tired of you, Tali.” Amelie shook her head, squeezing Tali's hand. “I can't imagine what  _ could  _ make me tired of you. I don't  _ care _ how often we get to be together, I don't  _ care _ that you're in the suit. You'll always be the cutest, nicest—” She paused and furrowed her brow. “Well, I guess none of us are really nice.” She muttered, digressing back to her point. “Anyway, my point is, I  _ love  _ you Tali, that means something to me. Miranda might  _ look  _ good, but she'll never be  _ you _ , and it's only you I want.” She looked down at Tali's chest. “And her tits are no match for yours.”

Tali reached up and gave Shepard a playful slap before dragging her down into a hug. “Thank you, Shepard. I feel the same way, I was just… I was worried when I saw you looking at her like that.”

Amelie laughed softly and pulled Tali closer, guiding her head to rest on her shoulder. “My dick is a cunt.” She chuckled, “It makes my life harder and I don't have any control over what arouses its interest.”

Tali groaned, placing a hand on Shepard's mouth, who was grinning proudly. “Please stop, you are very very bad at that.”

Amelie laughed and sunk down, resting her head on the pillow underneath her. “Omk.” She slurred against Tali's hand, who removed it quickly. “Okay, okay, I'll stop.” She took a deep breath, unclasping the sides of her vest and tossing it off the side of the bed. “I've got to go do something with Garrus and Williams tomorrow so I need to get to sleep.”

She felt smooth glass rub against her cheek as Tali nodded. “I won't keep you awake then. Did you bring that book with you before the ship blew up?” She looked up and glanced at the bag that had joined the vest. 

“Lucky you, I thought to bring it with me.” Amelie rolled over and fished through her bag, producing after a moment a hardcopy of  _ In Search of Lost Time _ , a combined book of all seven volumes. Although hardcopies of books were increasingly rare after the advent of full data archives, Shepard had managed to scrape together the credits to purchase it during a special publisher promotion. After having met Tali, she passed it off to her. Though she had little time to read it, now seemed the perfect time to catch up.

With a deep breath, Shepard closed her eyes as Tali cracked the book open to the worn bookmark, the musty smell wafting over her before it was lost in the rigidly refined air of the cabin and the smell of Tali's bodysuit. A cool air washed over her and the rustling of the pages formed a relaxing lullaby and she found herself quickly pulled into sleep.

* * *

 

Amelie awoke some unknown amount of time later, Tali sleeping quietly on her chest with the book perched between her large fingers. For a moment she was uncertain of what had woken her before the quiet beeping of her omni tool solved the mystery. Carefully she shifted her arm out from under Tali's side, bringing her omni tool to meet it halfway. Transferring the call to her earpiece, she turned her head away and whispered as quietly as she could. “Yeah?”

“Captain, there's some lady at the door for you.” Joker spoke up in response, pausing a beat to listen to something in the background before continuing. “Yeah, okay. She says Liara sent her. What do you want me to do?”

Shepard groaned quietly, mourning the continued interruptions in her sleep. “I'll be right down.” She clicked off the omni tool and slipped out from under Tali, laying her carefully on the bed. Although she was a heavy sleeper, Amelie was still cautious not to wake her. As an afterthought, she slipped the book from her hand and marked its place, setting it aside on the end table. 

Not bothering with her vest, she stepped out of the room, turning down the lights on her way out. From the corridor she made straight for the elevator, riding it down to the bridge where Garrus was waiting for her. Thinking little of it, she stepped past him, barely registering that he was following behind. 

Taking her place behind Joker, she peered at the camera screen. The woman appeared to be slightly older, clad in a white and green lab coat and toting a case of what was labelled ‘medical equipment’. Shepard tapped the speaker button. “Who are you?”

No response came and she furrowed her brow, opening her mouth to repeat her question until a gentle hand on her arm stopped her. “Uh, wrong button Captain.” Joker almost seemed patronizing as he swiped up on the screen and pressed the microphone button. From behind her she could hear Garrus stifling a laugh, but, for now, she ignored it.

“Who are you?” She repeated, this time drawing the attention of the doctor.

“Ah, you are the captain?” She straightened herself up and looked into the camera. “My name is doctor Chloe Michel. Liara wishes to tell you that she has taken the liberty of hiring me herself in order to ensure you do not ‘die charging headfirst into battle’.” Doctor Michel finished, smiling reservedly. 

Amelie tilted her chin downwards. That certainly did seem to her like something Liara would say, but it wasn't quite enough for her, and Liara would know it. “Did she say anything else?” Her voice was cagey and she was half prepared to go out and kick the doctor away herself. 

“Ah, yes. I am also to tell you 'Protheans and Lasers’.” If she was confused she didn't show it, and indeed seemed rather unfazed by saying something so strange.

Shepard nodded, reaching out to touch what she thought might be the button to open the door. A moment's pause and she retracted her hand, instead giving Joker a cue to do it himself. “Good enough for me. Welcome aboard, doctor.” 

The doors hissed open and she met the doctor face to face, guiding her into the ship. Michel smiled and accepted the invitation, glancing at the doors as they hissed shut. “Thank you, Captain… um.” She glanced expectantly at the woman in question. 

“Shepard.” She supplied, beginning down into the CIC with the doctor in tow. “I suppose Liara told you what we do here. And you're okay with that?” Amelie still found herself slightly on edge around the new arrival, but Liara was one of the handful of people she actually trusted. 

Doctor Michel made a small affirmative noise from behind her, following without question. “Yes, I am aware that you are pirates. I must admit this is not… ideal, but if you are asking if I am comfortable with it, you have nothing to worry about.”

Shepard nodded, pinging the elevator once again and stepping inside. “Good. I'll take you down to the medbay to get settled then.” She glanced over to the redheaded woman, crossing her arms defensively. “I'll tell you the same thing I tell everyone who's new here. This crew is a family. It's a small family but it's a family. It'll take them a while to warm up to you and you have to be okay with that. You do right by them and they'll be your best friends.” She rattled off the usual spiel that she felt she'd be giving many times over the next few days if everything went right. 

Although the doctor seemed slightly dismayed by this, her softer side shining through blindingly, she nodded in response, clutching her case a bit tighter. “Of course, you cannot trust many in your… line of work.” Her words carried a hint of distaste, though Amelie couldn't help admiring her honesty. 

The elevator stopped on the crew deck and they stepped out, met with the sounds of yet more sizzling. It seemed Ashley was still experimenting, but this time there didn't seem to be quite as much noxious gas in the air. Although the doctor lingered on her for a moment, Shepard ignored her, opening up the medbay and showing Michel inside. “Here we are. It's well stocked enough… I think. You've got free reign in this room, none of us here are really doctors.” She gestured around as the doctor explored the area. 

_ “Greetings, doctor Michel.”  _ EDI's mechanical voice filled the room and drew the doctor's attention to the ceiling.  _ “I am EDI, the  _ Normandy _ 's onboard cyberwarfare suite. I may also assist you in anything you may have need of during your stay.” _

“An AI?” Michel glanced around, “This is very advanced for a pirate's ship.” She turned to Shepard, a perplexed look in her eye. 

Amelie laughed softly, nodding and gesturing to the door on the far side of the room. “This wasn't really designed as a pirate ship. The AI core is through there, it's locked to everyone but me so I wouldn't try getting in.” She was lying, but the doctor seemed convinced enough, and she certainly  _ intended  _ to make it as such. 

“I understand, Captain. I will be as courteous a guest as possible.” She gave another smile, setting down her supplies. “May I leave this room?” Her voice was slightly amused, but still had an edge to it. 

Amelie couldn't help a small chuckle, “Of course, you can go pretty much anywhere else you want to, the places I don't want you will be locked so feel free to explore.” 

The doctor nodded, popping the lock on her briefcase and revealing a rather veritable assortment of medicine and equipment. “Certainly, I will familiarize myself with the ship as soon as I am settled in here.” She busied herself  with stocking the room, looking back to Shepard after a moment. “I would like to examine you as soon as possible, if you would permit. I feel it best to have a baseline for those I am working with.”

Amelie groaned internally, silently dreading being poked and prodded at by a doctor for the umpteenth time. Still, she suppressed the feeling and nodded, understanding the importance of such a thing. “Sure, just tomorrow, yeah? Joker woke me up to deal with you and I'd  _ really  _ like to get some sleep.” Exhaustion seeped into her voice as she spoke and she found herself backing up to leave. 

“Of course, Captain. Rest as long as you must, I will be here.” Michel smiled, returning to her work as Amelie took the cue to step out. 

As she began for the elevator, she took a deep breath that she regretted, met with a sulfuric smell that permeated the room. She looked to Ashley with borderline pity, raising her voice, “Hey, Williams. We've got a doctor on board, help her out with anything she needs.” Her voice was raised over the sound of sizzling meat.

Looking over her shoulder, the overwhelmed cook gave a rapid nod, almost relieved to have something else to do. “Got it, skipper!” She moved the pan off of the stove and turned the appliance off, heaving a defeated sigh. 

Holding a hand over her nose, Amelie continued to the elevator, pausing as she lifted a hand to press the button and looking up and the ceiling. “Hey, EDI. Lock up all the essential doors like I was talking about in there, would you?”

A moment of silence passed before the AI responded,  _ “Done.” _

Satisfied, Shepard stepped into the elevator and returned to Tali—and to sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I ain't know none of that French language very well so if I got anything wrong in this let me know and I'll fix it.


End file.
